Vamos abordar quatro aspectos em que o relacionamento entre homem e mulher no Reino de Deus se distingue do relacionamento fora do Reino. Os aspectos são os seguintes: o fundamento, o propósito, desenvolvimento e os critérios.

I) Um fundamento diferente

Fundamento é a base sobre a qual construímos algo. Muitas pessoas começam a namorar por causa de uma atração física, um sentimento, um interesse financeiro ou, até mesmo uma paixão destruidora.

O relacionamento entre discípulos deve ter o amor de Deus como fundamento, e não o amor sentimental. Na realidade, muito do que se chama “amor” é egoísmo disfarçado. O amor erótico, ou romântico, busca satisfação própria ou o benefício que pode ter através do outro.

Já o amor de Deus não é um sentimento instável e volúvel, mas sim uma atitude. Devemos amar como Jesus amou: entregando Sua vida (Jo. 13:34,35). Mas, devemos nos entregar a quem? Ao namorado(a)? Não, de forma alguma! Devemos fazer como Jesus: Ele se entregou a Deus em nosso favor (Ef. 5:1,2). Amar como Jesus nos amou é entregar-se a Deus em favor de alguém.

II) Um propósito distinto

No Reino de Deus os casais se relacionam para casar. Não há espaço para relacionamentos superficiais e irresponsáveis. Como discípulos, devemos ter compromisso no relacionamento.

Mt. 5:37 diz: “Seja, porém, a tua palavra: Sim, sim; não, não. O que disto passar vem do maligno”. Um discípulo de Cristo tem palavra. Um rapaz não deve dizer a uma menina que ela é a mulher de sua vida, para depois de alguns meses ela deixar de ser.

Não devemos declarar os nossos sentimentos se não temos como objetivo o casamento. Você só pode declarar seu amor por aquela pessoa se você vai honrar com a sua palavra. Ninguém tem o direito de fazer afirmações inconsequentes, que acabam fazendo mal à outra pessoa. Você só deve se declarar depois de ter a certeza da aprovação de Deus e ter reais intenções de casar-se com aquela pessoa.

III) Desenvolvimento contrário ao mundo

Tanto no mundo como no Reino de Deus, o relacionamento começa com o conhecimento. Porém o desenvolvimento é em direção contrária: no mundo o namoro começa a partir do conhecimento físico (beijos, abraços, carícias etc.), mas no Reino de Deus o conhecimento deve iniciar no espírito (coração), seguindo para a alma (intelecto) e, após o pacto do casamento, deve haver um conhecimento físico (sexo – corpo).

Ninguém deve casar-se imediatamente ao conhecer uma pessoa, porém deve haver um tempo de conhecimento. Tudo deve começar com a amizade. E numa amizade pode surgir um sentimento. Quando estiver seguro da vontade de Deus, você pode passar para o que chamamos de amizade comprometida, após preencher alguns princípios bíblicos. Passe tempo em oração. Ouça conselhos de irmãos maduros no Corpo.

IV) Alguns critérios básicos

“Quando aos moços, de igual modo, exorta-os para que, em todas as coisas sejam criteriosos” (Tt. 2:6).

Critério é aquilo que serve de norma para julgamento e apreciação.

a) Não há jugo desigual (I Co. 5:1; II Co. 6:14). Ambos devem ser cristãos, não apenas crentes nominais. Não deve haver jugo desigual, pois entre luz e trevas não há sociedade, comunhão, harmonia, união e ligação. Situação diferente acontece quando o casal é incrédulo e um deles se converte.

b) Submissão aos pais e ao Senhor (Ef. 6:1,2). O que leva você a pensar que, se ele(a) mente e engana aos seus pais, não vai fazer o mesmo contigo?

c) Precisam estar preparados para deixar pai e mãe, unir-se e tornar-se uma só carne (Gn. 2:24)

A amizade comprometida, com o tempo e com a confirmação de Deus nos corações pode evoluir para o noivado. Então, os noivos já começam a se preparar para o casamento. Ao casar, eles estão prontos para se conhecer fisicamente, tornando-se uma só carne.

 

Módulo I para Novos Discípulos

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